The Commonwealth of Virginia's Ultimate Blog

Thursday, April 21, 2005

Token Liberal Analyzes the Shad Planking

Note: I'm posting this on behalf of SST buddy Token Liberal.

Well, I (Token Liberal) went to my first Shad Planking, and had a blast. My joke for the afternoon was that I was there to provide perspective (since I had on my Deeds, Chap, and Kaine stickers, and needless to say the SST crew did not). So here is my perspective:

Best Conversation by Far:

With a former staffer of the Carson for Senate Campaign in Oklahoma:

“We were running ads like ‘Coburn sterilized a 14 year old girl without her consent while performing an abortion,’ you know, a really good ad. Coburn’s ads were, ‘Carson is a Democrat,’ and ‘Carson once met Hillary Clinton.’”

“Then Coburn came out and said, ‘middle school lesbianism is running rampant in Southeastern Oklahoma,’ and it turns out that the phrase was polling 55% POSITIVE for Coburn. I mean, what can you do??”

Best Conversation with a Candidate:

George Fitch. His history, as the former coach of the Jamacain Bobsled team is actually not as fascinating as his fathers, who was provost of Nanking during the Rape of Nanking. Moreover, when asked why he ran, he actually got into policy!!

Worst Conversation with a Candidate:

Creigh Deeds. While shaking my hand he kept up eye contact for about a second, and before I could open my mouth he had walked on. Very poor.

Best Handshake by a Politician:

Jerry Kilgore. Despite expectations, was very firm and was strong. Great Eye Contact with a warm Smile.

Worst Handshake by a Politician:

Creigh Deeds. See above.

Best Food:

Bolling. Bratwursts with real onions and relish.

Best Beer:

Creigh Deeds. Much props for splurging for Killian’s.

Best Dressed:

Delegate Bill Janis. Cowboy hat and frat boy glasses. He also easily gets the nod for biggest character.

Worst Dressed:

Tim Kaine. Jeans??

Best gimmick:

Temporary tattoos for Chap Petersen.

Best T-shirts:

Fitch. While only 2 of them, the Jamacian Bobsled team will always be cool.

Best Cup:

McDonnell. Very deep and very shiny. Honorable Mention: Focus on the Family. There will be nothing better to drink my latté in tomorrow morning while I drive to work in my Volvo wearing a Dean for America t-shirt

Worst Cups:

The entire Democratic ticket. Stickers on a plastic cup is not cool.

Best Beer truck Worker:

Chap Petersen’s. Guy was super cool and super nice.

Best presence:

Chap Petersen. His staff was everywhere, and their blue shirts stood out.

Worst Presence:

Viola Baskerville. No tent. No beer truck. It seemed like she was there for 30 minutes and left.

Better speech:

This one was a draw. Kilgore’s was better written with good jokes. Kaine had better delivery.

Winner of the Sign Wars:

Kaine. Not even close.

Best Use of Signs:

Chap Petersen. Knowing he could not compete with Kilgore and Kaine close in, he staked out a half mile of highway about 15 minutes out with Chap signs on both sides. They were evenly spaced, were beautiful, and definitely got his name out.

First candidate bumper sticker to go on the Honda Civic:

Chap Petersen. Really funny guy. Great staff. Great future.


Anonymous Anonymous said...

Chap will have a better future when people praising him can spell his name correctly.

Hint: He's Scottish, not Brittish.

10:35 AM

Anonymous Token Liberal said...

Hmmm. It turns out it is Petersen, not Peterson. I lost my way since I had never actually seen his last name--only "Chap." When you think about it, it is a great strategy. Chap is a much more runable name than J. Champman Petersen.

11:03 AM

Anonymous Token Liberal said...

Chapman. J. Chapman Petersen. I really should re-read my stuff before posting . . .

11:06 AM

Anonymous Token Liberal said...

Chapman. J. Chapman Petersen. I really should re-read my stuff before posting . . .

11:06 AM

Anonymous Token Liberal said...

Chapman. J. Chapman Petersen. I really should re-read my stuff before posting . . .

11:09 AM

Anonymous Laszlo said...

What's wrong with wearing jeans at the Shad Planking. You are stretching. What were you wearing.

1:32 PM

Blogger John K. said...

Lazlo, it really depends upon what kind of jeans they were. If they were the kind President Bush wears when in Crawford, they were probably okay.

9:35 PM

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Or he could run on what they call him in Fairfax City "Little Chappie"

1:59 AM

Anonymous Laszlo said...

I think the jeans looked better than the pink/orange shirt sported by the former AG. I doubt if he could wear that at "the ranch".

7:42 AM


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